Personal Values – Better Day Therapy

Values are different from goals. A goal is something you achieve. A value is a direction you move in — something you can act on at any moment, even in small ways. Knowing your values helps you make decisions, set priorities, and recognize when something feels off.

When life feels frustrating, empty, or like you're going through the motions, it often signals a mismatch between how you're living and what you actually care about. That gap is worth exploring.

How to use this page: Work through the steps below at your own pace. There are no right answers — only honest ones. Step 1 is about noticing what resonates. Step 2 helps you narrow to your core values. Step 3 invites reflection on how those values show up (or don't) in your daily life.

Step 1 Check all the values that feel true to you

Don't overthink it. Check any value that resonates, even a little.

Step 2 Identify your top 3 to 5 core values

Review what you checked above. Which ones feel most central — the ones you would give up last? Narrow your list to 3 to 5. Your selections from Step 1 will appear here as you check them, making it easier to see the whole picture.

Your checked values

Nothing checked yet — go back to Step 1 and check the values that resonate.

Narrowing exercise

Looking at what you checked, which 3 to 5 feel most non-negotiable — the values you would hold onto even when life is hard?

Is there a value on the list you almost didn't check — one that surprised you? What does that tell you?

Step 3 Reflect on how your values show up in your life

This is the most important step. Identifying values is easy. Looking honestly at whether you're living by them takes courage. These prompts are meant for reflection — and for conversation with your counselor.

Reflection prompts

Think about a recent week. Where did you see your core values reflected in how you spent your time and energy?

Are there areas of your life where your actions feel out of step with your values? What gets in the way?

Which value would make the biggest difference in your life if you lived it more consistently? What would that look like in practice?

Are there values on your list that conflict with each other — ones that sometimes pull you in different directions? How do you navigate that?

If someone who knew you well described your values based on your actions alone, what would they say? Is that the same as what you wrote down?

A note on values and mental health

Living out of alignment with your values is one of the quieter sources of distress — it can show up as irritability, low motivation, a vague sense that something is wrong, or feeling like you're going through the motions without meaning.

If you're noticing a gap between your values and how you're living, bring this to your next session. It's a useful starting point for goal-setting and for understanding what's been feeling hard.

These materials are for personal reflection and educational purposes only. They do not constitute clinical assessment or treatment. Please discuss any significant concerns with your counselor.